An Opinion

Many of us are in one of the best years of our life—teenage—sporty, bubbling and full of life. And incidentally this is also one of the most crucial years of our life—a time for developing our own identity and dispositions. Yet one thing that is common in all the teenagers is the desire to belong to peer groups, the desire to be included in the popular groups of school, college, classes, or anywhere else, the burning desire to simply not reveal or revel in our own individualitie

I am very sure that if we go around asking teenagers like us what their views are on fitting in with the crowd. Many will reply that they want to fit in, be like the popular kids, or go with the flow. If you ask people why they hang out where they do, common responses are that friends hang out there, or that it is a popular place. Why do people wear what they wear? Typical replies are that the clothes are in style, or that the popular kids wear them.

In fact, I feel this want for blending in does no go away with the termination of teenage. Even adults often want to mix in and follow group norms rather than setting the tides for themselves.

The other day my mother told me that she and her friends were planning to go on a picnic to a place near Bhiwandi. That was alright - I mean I got a day off, entirely to myself. But then she told me that her friend  had suggested that all of them wear jeans on the trip. The moment she ended speaking I burst out into peals of laughter. Come on man, at my mother’s age, it was really silly that any sort of lady would want to do something that I think all of us did last in what, 6^th grade. And it was then that I couldn’t resist thinking, Why do we have the urge to blend in so much? Is it because we are simply too afraid to stand out from the crowd and go against the tide? When the truth is that it is the odd one, who is actually responsible for changing the long queue of ducklings playing follow the leader!

Well, when I say don’t blend in I am implying that you should stand out, right? But by standing out I don’t mean that I expected my mother and her friends to wear crazy things, like a pink hairdo with oversized trousers and what not or have a funny haircut and wear a high hat that simply outdoes your balance. If I am not talking about appearance, then what do I mean when I say stand out? Lets just do a simple thing, a mind exercise sort of.  Look around you. You all seem to blend in because of your uniform, brown and white however ugly looing it may be it does give a sense of uniformity, a sense of belongingness to Singhania School. But now look closely, every person despite blending in is individually so very unique and special. Every person stands out as an individual personality, has an individual charisma. And this is exactly what I mean. Standing out in terms of integrity, in terms of character, in terms of your own natural persona—the person you truly are.

Frankly speaking, the truth of the day is that nowadays blending in has become synonymous for unanimity.

Unanimity, which has been a conventional concept of unity, fraternity and agreement. But what if I tell you that in today’s world, unanimity is an overrated concept thrown around to overshadow the power of uniqueness. One thing about us is that we mistake everything that’s unanimous for unity; be it an attitude, a decision or a voice. Because having the same attitude, the same decision, the same voice doesn’t mean we are united. A single unanimous voice for all doesn’t make us united, it makes us similar. Rather it’s the mutual respect; it’s the tolerance for unique attitude, unique decisions and unique voices, which makes us united.

Unanimity is something that is instilled in our minds from the very beginning. We are all treated as unanimous bodies from the moment we step our foot on the first day of school. Despite the fact that every human is created different by God, unanimity has been the major principle in the very institutions that carve out the humans from a living entity. No human being in this world is identical. But again, it’s our difference that makes us the beautiful species we are today. Often we see people afraid to showcase their uniqueness fearing to be left behind, fearing that they’ll fail to blend in. Like the Criss Jami quote goes, “When you’re the only sane person, you look like the only insane person.” People consider the “showcasing of uniqueness” as an act of egotism. But it is much more than that. It’s not always about showing off or being egoistic. It’s about being happy. It’s about being comfortable on one’s own skin. Because lowering one’s perspective about oneself is same as destroying one’s own self.

The legends we speak of today are called legends for a reason. They did what none thought could be done. They showed the power of uniqueness over the power of unanimity. What if Einstein chose to agree with his peers? What if Mandela chose to be oppressed? Would the world we live in today be the same? Okay, let’s just forget about legends for a while and focus on a much common example. Consider a team consisted of individuals of unanimous attitude and another with individuals of unique attitudes. While the latter may sound disheartening, but it is the one with the higher success rates. Because, from the evolution of mankind, unanimity is not what makes us great, Rather it’s the combination of unique perspectives that does.

The society will always suppress any ideas or voices which go against its principle of unanimity. Anyone choosing to be unique will be laughed at, will be alienated. Because it judges its citizens by a unanimous measuring scale. Ultimately, it forces them to wear a mask of falsehood and deception. But successful are those who can maintain their originality despite all these, who can make out of these without a mask of unanimity. In Dr. Seuss’s words,  Why choose to blend in when you were born to stand out?

Be your own authentic self. Be real. Be unique

What do you think? Let me know in the comments below!
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Until then....signing off!

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